Dear Blog – My Cynicism has a death count

August 31, 2010

Dear blog

Today was an unusual, yet totally unremarkable day of sorts…. (Dare to read on?)

It started as most do, with the first of my two alarms merely penetrating my dream, making me believe the seven o’clock triple J news report was for some reason at my old High school, where I had also mysteriously forgotten my pants. I have been having this recurring dream a lot. It only makes me want to say one thing to my unconscious “fuck you”.

The two glaring lapses in logic are this
(a)    In the dream I only realize I am not wearing pants after it seems I have already attended some classes, an maybe its lunchtime. Why would I have not noticed earlier? Surely I did not walk to school like this? Maybe I should reconsider my dream friends if they did not tell me of my fashion faux pa
(b)     In the dream world it is VERY embarrassing, however in reality I think its ILLEGAL.

If we analyse this dream under basic dream interpretation, which is dreams as wish fulfillment. Then I highly doubt this. It is not as if I ever thought “you know what? High school wasn’t nearly embarrassing enough, I think I should add partial nudity”. Or we could take a Freudian analysis. Which would probably assume this means I want to sleep with my mother and kill my father…or something.

My second alarm successfully alerted me from my slumber, and I not so my much “got” out of bed but more so “fell” out of bed (what can I say? I’m not a morning person) I proceeded to get dressed, put in my contact lenses (which involved poking myself in the eye several times) and elegantly dishevel my hair just right. Then I had a breakfast of black coffee and iron tablets (the manliest breakfast ever)

Here I wish I could say I rode my moped to the train station, scarf flailing in the breeze, but no. I just walked (but my scarf did flail in the breeze but not majestically)

The train platform was filled with your usual suspects who get the train at eight o’clock in the morning on a Tuesday. Business men who are clearly not successful enough to buy a car, old people with nowhere to go but all day to get there and school children who must be on cocaine to be that excited and energetic at such an ungodly hour.

It was then that I had the epiphany. Oh God! I’m just another train station cliché. The university student who wears scarves and cardigans while publicly displaying difficult/esoteric books they are reading. So maybe tomorrow I will bring a unicycle and vary it up a little.

Check back later in the week for more of my zany adventures, maybe I will tell you the tale of my trip to the record store, or the fable of the kitchen dishes.


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