Archive for June, 2010

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Look Out Hollywood! Or The Australian Equivalent

June 12, 2010

There is no hiding it and I have stated it many a time before, the quality of television has been on a steady decline. Ever since Bert Newton’s body was taken over by tiny robots and he stopped being witty, this happened circa 2005 Family Feud (you can fact check it, it’s on Wikipedia, and if it isn’t I will put it there nobody can stop me all I need is a slightly elevated blood: alcohol level and the internet) gone are the days of the quick thinking and dashing MacGyver and instead we get stuck with Paris Hilton getting a show devoted to her finding a best friend, really? I’m sure Paris Hilton has about the same IQ as a Canary so treat her like one, give her a bell toy and a mirror, she will be entertained for days.

If even these people are able to get a television show it seems like MTV are just giving air time away, they purely do not care what goes on their show “what!  A show about whores slutting it up on a bus competing for the attention of a rock star well past his prime?! Stop digging my friend you struck gold” due to their clear nonchalance towards broadcasting I would like to pitch to them some shows I believe will resonate with generations to come.

My Shadow and Me

This first show will be a buddy cop drama, starring me ad my partner, but here’s the twist…get ready…my partner is a dog-called shadow. Yes you read correctly we now have the technology to pull of such a feat, I too waited like James Cameron for Avatar for technology to catch up with my out there ideas, but I feel that in the year 2010 we have the technology to film a dog and put him on television. People’s values are changing and the common canine has more and more rights so why not a T.V show?

For this show my catch phrase will be (imagine in my most bad ass whiskey induced gravely voice) “crime casts the ugliest shadow” and just after I say that my dog shadow will leap from behind me and attack the criminal whether he be a drug lord or a teenager downloading movies illegally.

Love is Blind

This is a romantic comedy for all the ladies out there. This show is pretty much like hitch except in the show the character of hitch will also be BLIND! See what a pun the title is? You know it’s going to be a great show when the main joke is in the title (Made of Honour anyone?) so the protagonist will be black ad blind like Ray Charles who everyone loves. Instant hit!

Survivor: Kyle Sandilands Edition

I know I give reality T.V a hard time however I would like to propose an idea for the next season of survivor. In this season we just leave Kyle on a VERY remote and desolate island. Hell we don’t even have to film it as long as I get to leave Kyle on an island somewhere.

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