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The Woes of Global Warming

July 29, 2009

I know what your thinking, “Wow a blog about global warming, how edgy, what’s next, some Chuck Norris jokes?” No, that’s next week. That being so the global warming crisis is one of my main concerns, right up there with blankets for the homeless and coats for cats in the winter.

Environmental issues seem to have taken a back seat in recent times since people are dying from swine flu and can’t afford business class flights due to the economic crisis. So have no fear, I’m here to remind you that we are all going to drown because of rising sea levels.

I know what you’re thinking, what can little old me do to help? Well here is my plan to save the world.

If everyone buys a sham wow and dunks it in the ocean then by my calculations sea levels will drop by A LOT. According to the magnificent infomercial the sham wow holds 12 times its own weight in liquid, meaning marine life would be a thing of the past.

Al Gore, while you’re in your office making movies I’m out here in the real world getting shit done. You’re welcome, Mother Nature.

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One comment

  1. My God… this is the best idea yet. But what do we do with the sham wow’s afterwards? Do we freeze them and put them back in antarctica?



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